Gay rights.
We had to write a press release promoting our new party and this is what I came up with:
A new right-wing party is happy to finally integrate their views into the nation. On Friday the 12th, A Nation Against Gay Equality came forward with groundbreaking ideals and conservative opinions in regards to their beliefs concerning the homosexual lifestyle.
Party leader Fred E. Mercury shares his excitement in finally taking back what was unlawfully stolen and predominantly a heterosexual privilege.
“I’m sure I speak for all of us in saying that the façade adopted by homosexuals as being harmless will not fool us any longer,” He says, “We will expose them for what they are.”
“I’m tired of overfed politicians having no back bone when it comes to cutting out the rot of this nation,” Mercury explains as well as promises to rule with an iron fist, “I do enjoy a good fisting.”
The ANAGE are prepared to cleanse the nation with objectives including women keeping their hair at a presentable length, no shorter than below the shoulders and the banning of men wearing pink clothing items, “real men don’t wear pink.” Adds Mercury. No longer shall the rainbow be affiliated with any same-sex connotations. Preferably the use of the rainbow in any fact or fictitious context will be banned wholly and no longer can the term “gay” be affiliated with a sense of happiness and delight.
The need for homosexuals shall be exterminated by instructing everyone to start planning their own weddings and decorating their homes themselves. “We really have to be stern with this, these gays are relentless, take away their creativity and we’ll take away their driving force,” says Mercury.
“The thought of gays adopting parent-less and abandoned children or having a monogamous relationship proves their malicious intentions and I hope that you will all join me in saying, ‘enough is enough!’”
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Emma Wright? tehe.
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